There aren't enough hours in the day

I feel distant in so many ways

I hate and love things about myself at the same time.

I wish I was me again

Something is missing. Something is wrong. I just don't know what it is.

I need a break from my life, a nice 7 day nap or something.

I feel sooooo unaccomplished, so useless, so corrupt.......too much of the bad stuff not enough of the good stuff. I don't know where I'm headed. I'm confused. I'm upset. I care about people too much. I get hurt too easily. I'm too emotional. I'm seriously convinced that I'm the wrong guy for Christina. I wish I could be someone else than I am right now. I'm not good enough for anything. I want things I can't have (at least not right now). I'm too anxious sometimes, and not enough other times. I pay too much attention, and I don't pay any attention at all. I care too much, but I don't care enough. I try so hard, but it's worthless. I mean so well but I never follow through. I have too much to do, not enough time. I'm horrible. I'm a loser, I'm a dork, I'm weird, I'm NOT funny anymore. I've lost the ME in me. There's a lil bit here and there......but i unno......................I NEED HELP. Like I said before, something's missing. Why do I feel so great at times, but also feel the deepest worthlessness? Why can't I sustain my happiness? If I can't support myself and keep myself happy, how can I ever plan on having a wife n kids? I need to go to Church, i wanna do bible study too, I wanna put more time into my website, I wanna actually do crap for christina's website, I wanna have money to buy crap for myself, for Christina, and for friends. I wanna GO OUT WITH friends and actually have a social life. I wanna play more guitar and get better at it. I want to be a better follower of God. I wanna become a better person. I wanna be better for Christina. I wanna have all this crap but I think none of it's gonna happen. most important stuff there is the church, bible, god stuff, and stuff that has to do with christina.

I wanna have a day without feeling alone and empty.

I NEED HELP. SOMEONE, God, please help me.....I need it. SO bad....I don't know what to do, I don't know where to go, I don't know how I should be, I don't know what's wrong and what's right. I NEED YOU!!!